Abyss .

Just wondering ,

Why do people have to be this much lonely? What's the point of it all? Millions of people in this world, all of them yearning, looking to others to satisfy them, yet isolating themselves. Why? Was the earth put here just to nourish human loneliness?

 I usually try to build a fence around the fatal emptiness inside me,  i had to create a sunny person in me . But if you peeled away the ornamental egos that i had built, there was only a void of nothingness and the intense thirst of being sad came with it. Though i tried to forget it, the nothingness would visit me periodically -by the night , in rainy evening     or any natural dull setting in the nature.

Even if i  somehow managed to escape from this cage, i found myself just in another, a larger one.

In a sense, I’m the one who ruined me: I did it myself.

Sometimes i think that people’s hearts are like deep wells. Nobody knows what’s at the bottom. All you can do is only imagine by what comes floating to the surface every once in a while.

I believe Everyone, deep in their hearts, is waiting for the end of the world to come.

It's like Tolstoy said. Happiness is an allegory, unhappiness a story.

The strength I'm looking for isn't the type where you win or lose. What I want is the kind of strength to quietly endure things , unfairness, misfortunes, sadness, mistakes, misunderstandings.

Another aspect of this void is that i think ,I was always hungry for love. Just once, I wanted to know what it was like to get my fill of it -- to be fed so much love I couldn't take any more. Just once.

But still  the another side of me tells me that , Just like Body cells replace themselves every month. Even at this very moment. Most everything you think you know about me is nothing more than memories.

Life is not like water. Things in life don’t necessarily flow over the shortest possible route.

Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.